More Devotions with Mike :-)

This one was based of Christ's Birth as recorded in Luke 2:1-20,

Does it strike anyone else as odd that the King of Kings and Lord of Lords would choose these circumstances to come into the world? Not only does He not even get a decent bed on which to spend His first night of human life. The first people God decides to share this joyous occasion with are shepherds. They were the most disreputable crew of people around during that day, kind of like the homeless in today’s society. You’d think the Master of the Universe would have gone to further lengths when bringing His own Son into the world. These days we might expect God’s Son to be born to wealthy parents, have an elegant bed and house in which to grow up and have become an instant celebrity through out ever-present world of mass media exposure.

Yet, if you think back to your Old Testament stories, I think you’ll see a pattern. God didn’t chose the largest and most powerful nation to be His People. When Israel began, it was just one man, Abraham, on a journey because of a promise, yet look what it became! David, Israel’s finest and most memorable king, started out as a shepherd boy. Moses was a murderer on the run. The list goes on. Is it my imagination or does it seem that God enjoys showing off? He loves taking the side of the underdog and showing the word just how much is possible through faith in Him. He goes bonkers when people are forced to look at a miraculous situation and say, “No way is this an ordinary occurance, Surely we have seen the hand of God this day.”

But maybe you’re thinking, if that’s the case, why don’t miracles happen every day? Wouldn’t such a God want to show off more often? I think miracles do happen everyday, we’ve just forgotten how to look for them. We expect humoungous showings and amazing healings. Yet look back at the birth story. The most amazing miracle of God’s coming to earth appeared as totally ordinary. It could have very easily gone unheard of. Maybe God does show off in little ways everyday. Yes, His grace is evident in the innocent smile of a child, especially in their birth. It’s there n the look of affection between two young lovers. It’s there in the promise of Spring and her sister Summer amidst the cold of Winter. In the tender touch of a caring nurse, In the precise cuts of a well-trained surgen. Even in the coming of death after a long suffering battle with cancer, He is there. And from within He draws all to Himself and yearns for them to know Him.

We too can play a part in God’s grace, for we are His hands and feet. We are called to minister to all as if we were ministering to Him. So let us walk in His Grace today and share it with all we meet.

Emmanuel

Son of God, Immanuel

Son of God, Immanuel
Tonight You came with us to dwell

You came to show us how to live
You came to us eternal life to give

Child of the King, You came from above
To teach us the true meaning of love

Took on our flesh, took on our sin
Our earthly burden, You took within

By Your hands, our wounds were healed
With Your blood our hearts are sealed

Teach us this day
To walk in Your way

Almighty Father, watch over us
Protect us from our darkness

Holy Spirit, Who dwells within
Keep us this day from all sin

Jesus, Redeemer, Lover, and Friend
To us Your embrace now extend

As we gather with our family
As we gather with our friends

Your love guides our hearts, as we amble blindly
While we hold hands, Your grace descends

And for those of us, who spend this season alone
As our spirits within us groan

Remind us, I pray, that You are always there.
Remind us, O Lord, that You always care.

The road we walk is treacherous
But You O Lord are ever with us

Give us this day our daily bread
Watch over us as we go to bed.

A-men.

Mike's Musings (12-04-04)

Mike’s Musings (12/04/04)

Dear family & friends,

Life Update

Some of you out there still probably find yourselves wondering what I do in a typical day at the V.A. Well, it would probably be easier to describe my workload. Currently, at the V.A., I’ve been assigned to two floors, both of which have about 20 veterans per floor most ranging from 70 - 90+ years of age. My first major interaction with most of these happens through doing Spiritual Assessments (SA), a 13 in depth questionnaire which covers everything from their religious / denominational preference to their level of daily peace and what might be hindering that in their case. When a veteran is newly admitted on one of my floors, I am obligated to complete one these with them within two weeks of their arrival. In addition, I have weekly staff meetings for each of these floors where we do quarterly and yearly reviews of each veteran. I have found it a good idea to have the SA’s for those veterans being staffed in hand while attending these meetings. If an issue is raised during the SA, I then talk with the veteran to see how often s/he would like to meet to dialogue about it. There are also a few hospice veterans on those floors who get weekly visits. Every once in a while, there are also veterans who are diagnosed as Seriously Ill (SI) or close to death. These veterans get daily visits from yours truly.

In addition, I get to do some work with those veterans going through our Center for Chemical Dependency. I usually meet twice with these guys/gals. First, we take them through a computerized and much more thorough version of the SA (CAP) and talk with them about the results afterwards. Second, we meet with them to complete a Fifth Step. For those of you unfamiliar with AA terminology, this is where the veteran goes through and confesses all the wrongs that s/he has ever committed or had committed against him/her in the presence of God and one other person. I, basically, think of it as the Protestant version of Confession. In an average week, I complete about 5 SA’s, 4 CAP’s, 1-2 5th Steps, go to two staff meetings, meet a number of veterans on an ongoing basis and do the occasional SI. Since we are a hospital, and a V.A. one at that, every one of these encounters has to be documented. I also meet weekly with my fellow chaplains to talk through some of these veteran interactions and encourage each other on in our work together. So, I do find myself a bit busy these days ;-)

Sharing My Journey: Of Balance & the Never-ending Tyranny of Time

You got a glimpse of this in my last newsletter. Now, I guess, it’s time for the full deal. Just looking at the above “job description” makes me feel somewhat overwhelmed at times. Throughout the past days and weeks, I have come up against the need to balance taking time to care for others and myself again and again. There just never seem to be enough hours in the day to get through all I want to do and get everything I need to do done as well. My daily time with God in the mornings has become very precious to me throughout all this. Especially as I’ve taken to going through the Lord’s Prayer every morning and using it as a guide to pray through the day and all those I care about. I have found it amazing how much better a visit goes if I pray through it first and ask God’s peace to guard my heart and His grace to guide my steps. In addition, I have also found the experience to be a crucible for testing out how I’m meeting my needs and those of the people I minister with and to.

For poems this month, I’ve got two. I’ll also post my traditional Christmas poem on my blog website. The first is about being my own shepherd and the second is of caring for others. Coupled together, they tell of the balance I am working to achieve in my own life.

Lies & Truth
I'm feeling kinda venerable tonight
My mixed up emotions are bubbling through
What I know as truth seems so boring
And deception seems so exciting
Though I know the difference between them

Chorus:
Lord, will You be my strength?
When I don’t want to be strong?
Will You carry me along
When it all seems so far gone
Lord, will you help me fight
When it feels like the battle’s already been lost

To lie is sin and sin is death
In truth is life or so I’ve been told
Yet the lie looks so attractive
And the truth just seems so covered with dust
For a lie can look like the truth
Just as a wolf can don sheep’s clothing
But in truth it’s still a lie
Despite it’s appearance otherwise.
Yes, this must be a wolf in sheep’s clothing
And my resistance is low

Chorus

I know my emotions can fool me
But, man, what I feel seems so real
You say tomorrow will be different
Yet today still has so much left to live
The devil he is so clever
And I am so naïve

Chorus

And it all comes down to choice
Will I choose to live or die
Will I choose to believe the lie
Or embrace the truth that is Christ
To stand strong in His might
And know He is on my side
This, at least, I know is true
God is real and He cares for me.

Forgotten Tears
He sits at the end of the bar
washing away years of misery and sorrow with each vodka shot he downs

She sits in an abandoned house
waiting for a husband who will never come home.

He can have any girl he wants
but none can touch his fenced in heart.

She walks along the dusty road
heading for a home that no longer wants her company.

He sits by the roadside without a cent to his name,
his “friends” took everything they could claim.

She sits alone everyday,
none even think of joining her.

He sits in the back of church every Sunday
praying to a god he long ago decided was dead.

Everyone knows one.
Their faces crowd our streets and hallways.
Souls that life threw to the wayside.

Try to help them though we might,
we have no solution to offer.
Only eyes to cry their forgotten tears

Thank you again, so much, for letting me share my life and ministry with you in this way. I pray you are blessed and drawn closer to our Loving Father through its reading. Certainly, I know I was in its writing. This month, I’ll be leading the Protestant service at the V.A. on December 14th. The service starts at 9:30 am and all are welcome to come. That also means I’ll get the following Friday off and I would love to spend that weekend with some of you down in St. Paul or wherever. Just let me know what works best for you and I’ll see what I can do. I hope you are all doing well and enjoying this holiday season. May God’s presence tangibly touch each of your lives during this Advent and Christmas season.

In His Grip,
Michel Jon Willard

A Prayer of Invocation

Part of this prayer was actually published in the church newsletter of Soloman's Porch, so I thought I would also display it here for you as well. Here goes:

O come, o come, beloved Lover of our souls.
You Who knows us deeper and more intimately than even we know ourselves
You Who see us as we truly are, not as we want to be, not as we should be, but as we are today, this moment
You see us and You declare, each of us individually and collectively,
Your treasured and precious ones.
Fill us, O Father with Your peace which surpasses all understanding.
Amen

My Thanksgivings

Yet another excerpt from my weekly devotions. The scripture text for this time was 1Corinthians 10:16,
Being that tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day, I thought I might start by sharing some of the things I am thankful for this year. I am thankful for God Who continues to draw me closer to Himself each day. I am thankful for the Holy Spirit Who renews me daily from within. I am thankful for Jesus Christ, by Whose blood I have been saved and in Whose footsteps and am learning to walk more and more in each day. I am thankful for my family who support me so much with their love, prayer and finances. I am thankful for my friends, who continue to be living representations of God’s love and grace towards me. I am thankful for my church, in whose fellowship I can continue to grow in my relationship with God and His people. I am thankful for the V.A. who have given me a place where I can both earn a living and carry out my ministry of love and care to those who need it here. I am thankful for my fellow chaplains here, both those who supervise me, as well as those who minister along side me, for continuing to work with me and help me to improve in my serving of others. I am thankful for all of the staff here who I also work with, that you value my presence and acknowledge my service to these veterans. I am thankful for you veterans out there, that you humbly and graciously accept my service to you even when it may fall short of your expectations. The list could go on forever. Indeed it could for each of us, could it not? We each have many things and people in our lives to give thanks for. We each have many blessings from God for which to give Him praise, do we not? Let us remember that tomorrow as we gather around the table with our friends and family.
Let us also remember the greatest gift God has ever given us, that is His Son, Jesus Christ. His blood was shed for the forgiveness of our many sins and His body broken that ours might be whole again. So, when we break bread and share drink tomorrow, let us remember the One Whose body was broken and His blood shed for us. Let us invite Him to be there with us at the table as we do each time we celebrate His Communion, for as Paul wrote in the passage I read this morning, “Is not the cup of thanksgiving for which we give thanks a participation in the blood of Christ? And is not the bread that we break a participation in the body of Christ?”

Speaking to Our Hearts

This is another excerpt from my devotions this morning. The passage quoted is from the Gospel of John 21:1-19,

Imagine what it would have been like to be Peter at this moment. Just last week you were eating dinner Jesus, when He turned to you and said, “Peter, the Devil wishes to sift you like wheat, but I have been praying that you will weather the test.” This would certainly raise my awareness. This is the man you have come to see as the very Son of God, the Messiah you’ve been waiting for years to come. The One Who had said you would receive the keys to the kingdom and that upon you He would build His church. And now He’s say the devils wants to “sift you like wheat!” Whatever could he mean? Then Jesus tells you that you will betray Him not once, not twice, but three times during the coming night. Such is unfathomable and of course you deny it adamantly. Yet just a few hours later you find yourself doing the very thing you just swore you would never do. And you do it just as Jesus said you would. Of course you find this a cause for weeping. The devil has come and you have been sifted out. You betrayed the very One who entrusted you to lead His future church. You have failed as a leader among your fellow disciples. Your world is falling apart.
You can’t even bear to watch your Lord’s execution. You feel at a total loss for what to do next. Then you hear from a fellow disciple that Jesus’ body is missing and you run to the tomb only to find the burial cloths folded neatly in the corner. Your world continues to stumble out of control. You decide to back to the one thing you know best. Fishing. Yet you find yourself, even in that, a failure. You and a few fellow disciples spend the night fishing and catch not even one fish.
Then a stranger calls out from the shore and has the nerve to ask you if you’ve caught any fish. Exhausted and tired you and your friends yell back, “No!”
The stranger has the gall to then ask you to try throw your net on the other side. Can he not imagine you haven’t already tried there? Yet you decide to give it a try anyway. Suddenly, the net fills with fish and you find yourself reminded of a previous encounter like this. You begin to realize this is no stranger who called out to you. One of the other disciples speaks aloud the truth your heart has already recognized. “It is the Lord.” You run to meet Him. He then asks you and the other disciples with you to have breakfast with Him.
After the meal, Jesus takes you aside. You want to beg His forgiveness. You want to try and explain your actions. You want to . . . But He beats you to the punch and with loving words speaks right into your heart. Three times He asks if you love Him. Three times you answer that, of course, you do. Three times He asks you to feed His sheep. Maybe it was at the moment, maybe it wasn’t until afterwards. At some point you realize Jesus just reinstated you as His chosen leader for His church.

In this moment Jesus showed immense compassion and insight into the life of Peter. Jesus knew that Peter’s betrayal of him would crush him. He knew it would utterly break his heart and if not treated rightly would ship wreck Christianity before it even got started. This, I think, was what Jesus meant by saying that the devil wished to sift Peter as wheat. I don’t think this is a reference to Peter’s future betrayal, but that Jesus knew Peter’s leadership potential and the very future of His church was on the line. That’s why Jesus spoke to Peter as He did in this passage. He told him the exact words he needed to hear in order to get at the root of the problem. What Peter heard and experienced in the exchange spoke right to his broken heart and floundering leadership ability. Jesus knew exactly what to say to Peter.
Maybe you have problems too many to count, issues too weighty to surmount, a life you are finding very difficult to weather your way through. Maybe you feel a bit like Peter did here. Jesus knows your needs. He is attending to them even now. If you slowed down enough to listen, you might even hear Him whispering the very words you need to hear.

Thoughts on the Final Judgement (Remixed)

The following is taken from a devotion that I lead based on the same text as the next posting (Matthew 25:31-46). The main differnce is the story used.

What comes into your mind when you hear these passages? Do you see visions of God sitting on His royal throne separating the Righteous from the unrighteous? Maybe you get feelings of dread? Or are suddenly wondering if you’d be ready if God came back today? Today I wish to share with you a different vision of Judgment Day.
I spent my junior year of college abroad in Israel and while there; I studied a number of Jewish parables. One of the ones that stuck me the most was a picture of heaven. It struck me first off, because there really is not that much Jewish speculation about heaven, and secondly because of it’s content. Let me share it with you and, I think, you’ll gather why it caught my attention.
“I once dreamed I was given a tour of both heaven and hell. In both cases, I entered into a very elaborately adorned dinning room with the food immaculately set up. Then the dinner guests were filed in and sat down at their seats. It was at this point that I realized something was very different between these people and myself. The arms of every one of the dinner guests seemed to be permanently locked at the elbows. Then the eating commenced. It was at this point that I saw a distinct difference between the residents of heaven and the residents of hell. One room stayed immaculately clean the whole meal through, while the other became a total mess. When I took a closer look to discern the reason for the difference, I saw that the inhabitants of the clean room were serving each other, while those in the messy room were continually trying to feed themselves even though they never actually succeeded in getting a single morsel in their mouths. I didn’t even need to ask which was which, for that much was quite obvious.”
Is that the type of picture that you have a heaven, or even or judgment day? What do you think made the difference between the two rooms? The food in both cases was the same. The set up was the same; even the guests themselves looked the same on the outside. Yet once the eating commenced, that was when the true essence of the guests came out. For while the inhabitants of one realized right away that it was only in serving each other that they themselves would ever get fed, the others kept trying to feed themselves.
I think it is the same with the gospel passage I read this morning. Both the sheep and the goats were confronted with people who needed help and while the sheep helped all they saw in need, the goats did not. Why? The difference that, I think, Jesus wanted to emphasize was not how many more people the sheep served than the goats, but the heart behind their serving. The emphasis in the Jewish parable I read was not on the outward behavior of the different people, but on their inner motivations. Do you see the difference?
To me, the distinction is crucial. I have firmly come to believe over the years I have known God, that lasting transformation and change comes not in adapting a certain set of behaviors and learning to live my life right, but receiving Christ into your life and allowing Him to change you from the inside out through the power of His Holy Spirit at work within your heart. Once the heart is changed, outer change will follow suit.
The question I wish for you to leave with today is not what am I doing wrong and how can I become better, but who am I becoming? Am I becoming more and more like Christ every day inside and out? Am I taking the time daily to hear His voice and learn who He is inviting me to become? Am I trying to live my life on my own according to His principles or am I learning to hear His voice and follow Him into the life He is calling me to?

Thoughts on the Final judgment

The following is an excerpt from a brief sermon I preached this past Sunday on the Final Judgement in Matthew 25:31-46,

What comes into your mind when you hear these passages? Do you see visions of God sitting on His royal throne separating the Righteous from the unrighteous? Maybe you get feelings of dread? Or are suddenly wondering if you’d be ready if God came back today? Today I wish to share with you a different vision of Judgment Day.

I spent much of the last year working in and with a relatively young church. During one of their outreach attempts to the youth of the area, they showed a short film left quite an impression on me.

The film started with the father of a typical American family leaving for work. His daughter gives him some licorice for a snack and he promptly puts it in his pocket. He also happens to be wearing a rather warm-looking coat. He drives along and is suddenly being hit by another car.
The next scene shows the same father now heading for a train station. He is now headed for either heaven or hell, I presumed. A conductor gave him a ticket and he headed for the train. Once he boarded, he found that there was homeless woman also aboard the train. Not really desiring to talk with her he takes a seat at a bit of a distance from her. The train started to move.

A little while later the woman appeared to be shivering and said, “Oh, dear. I’m quite cold. Could I borrow your jacket?”
“Sorry, ma'me.” the father replied. “It’s the only one I have and I’m not sure what’s ahead.”
“Of course.” She responded. “ I fully understand.”
Another short time passed and the woman turned to the man and seemed to notice the licorice sticking out of his front pocket. She said, “I sure am hungry. Do you think you could spare one of those licorice you have in your pocket there?”
“Sorry, ma’me.” replied the father, “My daughter gave them to me and they’re all I have to remember her by.”
“Of course.” She responded. “I fully understand.”
Shortly there after the train came to a stop and the father got off. He looked around to see what had happened to the woman, only to find she had vanished.
“Oh well,” he thought. “I’m sure she’ll get whatever’s coming to her.”
He headed off down the road before him, not thinking about it any longer. Then he noticed a staircase before him with a small sign. It read, “This way to Judgment.” And pointed up the stairs. So, up he went.
Then he came to the top of the stairs and found himself in a greenhouse all filled with plant life of many different kinds. Wondering around, he finally came upon the gardener and asked, “Could you point me in the direction of the Judgment?”
“I am the Judge.” She replied. And suddenly the father found himself face to face with the very woman he had just disregarded not once, not twice, but three times.

What was your reaction to that story? Maybe you’re sitting there wondering, “What would I do in that situation?” or “Was how the father acted so wrong?” or “There wasn’t even a warning!” Personally, I see a lot of similarities between the story I just told and the gospel passage I read this morning. In both cases none of those being judged were really aware of what was going on. They never realized that their present actions could have eternal consequences. Yet they did. Most of us never realize the ways we act in our present lives will affect our eternal destiny and yet they will. Why is this the case? Why would God base His eternal judgment on something so arbitrary? It just seems so random. Or maybe not.

Have you ever noticed that people act a lot differently publicly than they do privately? How they may be one person when they’re on display, and another when they’re just living day to day? Why is that? I think it’s because when we know we’re being watched we act exactly as we know we’re supposed to act and when we think we’re alone or just blending into the crowd, we let ourselves loose. We feel free to just be ourselves when no one’s looking. I think God knows this. He knows we wear masks in public and take them off in private. He knows everyone of us has a split personality. Some of us have been wearing that mask so long we no longer know who we really are. He knows that too.

He knows that it’s when our guard is down, when we think no one’s watching that our true essence comes out. He knows we’re ashamed of that side of us, yet that’s the very part of us He came to save. That’s the part of us He is inviting to come follow Him and become like His Son, Jesus Christ. He’s not so much concerned with how much we do for Him publicly as He is about who we are becoming privately. That’s what really matters when it comes to our eternal destiny. Do you see the difference yet?

To me, the distinction is crucial. I have firmly come to believe over the years I have known God, that lasting transformation and change comes not in adapting a certain set of behaviors and learning to live your life right, but receiving Christ into your life and allowing Him to change you from the inside out through the power of His Holy Spirit at work within your heart. Once the heart is changed, outer change will follow suit.

The question I wish for you to leave with today is not what am I doing wrong and how can I become better, but who am I becoming? Am I becoming more and more like Christ every day inside and out? Am I taking the time daily to hear His voice and learn who He is inviting me to become? Am I trying to live my life on my own according to His principles or am I learning to hear His voice and follow Him into the life He is calling me to?

Made from the Dust of the Earth

This is another excerpt from my weekly devotions:
In my previous reflection I talked a lot about how we are made in God’s image. Now, some may ask, “If we were each made in God’s image, then how did we become so messed up?” A sensible question, certainly. If God is perfect, would not those made in His Image also be perfect? Let me answer that by pointing back top the first passage I read today (Genesis 2:7). Notice it is from the second chapter of Genesis. The first passage I quoted last week was from the first chapter. This chapter adds something that the first chapter left out. It says we were made from the “dust of the earth.” God made each of us in His Image out of the lowest material on earth: dust. Does this strike anyone else as a bit odd? We were made to be the highest of all creation, yet we were made from the most filthy stuff imaginable. How does that work? I think we get an idea from the second passage I read (2Cor. 12:7). According to Paul, God’s power is made most manifest in our weakness. He shines the most when we are at our least.
And if you look all through scripture, you can see a similar theme: From God choosing Israel, the smallest of all nations, to be His Promised People, to God choosing David, a little shepherd boy, to topple Goliath and become Israel’s king. Even Jesus death on the cross was evidence of this. To die on the cross was the most shameful of all deaths, yet through His death, Christ won for us the victory over sin. It appears God likes rooting for the little guy. He enjoys cheering on the underdog. I don’t know about you, but I find that pretty encouraging when I think about the mess my life has been at times. The truth of the matter is when we are at our utter lowest is the time we finally realize how really messed up we are and how much we need God. We grow to depend on Him more and more and that’s what the Christian life is all about.
So, hear this and be heartened on. God loves cleaning up and working with you through your mess-ups. It doesn’t matter to Him that this is the first or the tenth time you’ve been through rehab. It doesn’t matter to Him whether you’re on your deathbed or adjusting to life with part of you now missing. Whatever your ailment, whatever your disease, come to God and know you are loved and accepted. Truly there is nothing that can separate you from the love of God. Absolutely nothing!! God loves you and longs for you to know and love Him. Won’t you come this day? Really, what is stopping you?

Communion: What's it mean?

Part of my function as a chaplain is to perform commuion when a patient would like it as well as part of those Sunday Worship services I lead. At first I would not have thought this would lead to any trouble. My friends and I have shared communion with each other a number of times without thinking more about it than we thought necessary. Yet an issue did arise when my giving out communion was thought of. It turns out that all of the present chaplains of the VA are of more liturgical and high church denominations (a catholic priest and two Lutherans ministers) yet here I was fresh out of a Baptist seminary with only an M.Div. to my name. The question was how to consecrate the elements when I was officiating and how to dispose of them once I was done. At the core of this is the Catholic and Lutheran belief that when the priest says the prayer, the bread and wine somehow actually become the body and blod of Christ. This is called transubstatiation or consubstatiation depending on the tradition. Hence the consectation is when this takes place and the authority of the one doing the consecrating is a crucial question. In most protestant denominations the bread and wine symbolize the body and blood of Christ in communion, but they do not become them. Hence, my ability to share communion with my friends was unencombered by my lack of ordination.

What struck me throughout this, in addition to the different understanding of what was happening at communion and the amount of necessary ceremony around it, I was also struck by an interesting paradox. Many Lutheran and Catholic churches I have been in practice Open Table or allow any one to come and take communion who wishes. Though this is certainly more the case with Lutherans and other high church protestant denominations. In many Baptist and free churces, the Table is much more closed. Some churches only allow those who have membership to have communion while others offer it only to all those who have recieved Jesus into thier hearts. Do you see the paradox yet? Baptists and other free churches beleive the bread and wine are only symbols of Christ's body and blood yet restrict who should take it. Lutherans and Catholics bielieve the blood and wine actually become Christ's body and blood at the moment of consectration yet allow anyone who wishes to take and eat it. I know I'm probably way over generalizing, but do you see my point?

Please understand I'm not trying to say that one is any better or any less true than the other. To me, whether the bread and wine in some mysitcal way become the body and blood of Christ or they just act as symbols does not make a difference. What really matters is that Christ is present to the beleiver when they take communion. Commnets? Questions? Queries? Ask away!

Weekly Devotions with Mike

Part of my new job as a Resident Chaplain at the V.A. in St. Cloud is to offer devotions once a week. Here's an excerpt from my last one:

Why are we so important to God that He would send His only Son to die for our sakes? It’s often a question I’ve pondered. And I don’t think I’m the only one or even the first. The psalmist once wrote, “What is man, that You care for him?” Yet care God does. But still why? I wish to explore that question a bit in today’s devotion and following. To answer it fully would take more time than I have here and now, so let me just give it a start and maybe wet your appetites to come back for more. I have come to see that God’s care for us began all the way back in the garden when He first created us. According to Genesis 1, we are each made in the image of God. To me this means that every person I come across here at the V.A and in the world is created in the image of God. Therefore when I get to know that person at their deepest level I’m am also getting to know God. When I care for that person, I am caring for God. When I sit and listen to that person go on and on about all their problems, I’m listening to God. When I touch another person, I am touching God. I could go on. Get it yet? In our day to day interactions with each other, we are not only rubbing shoulders with each other, we are also bumping up against God Himself. Truly a sobering thought, and yet also an encouraging one. God has lived in our flesh, He has seen us at our worst, and yet, still He bestows His love upon us. Let us return that love in our daily lives with each other.

Grief: I expected it, but not like this . . .

It was the middle of my first week at my new job as a chaplain resident at the V.A. Center here in St. Cloud, when one of the head chaplains gave a presentation on grief to myself, the other chaplain resident and about a dozen or so recovering chemical dependants. I had expected to hear some stuff of relevance, given that I had just been to my grandmother's funeral that past weekend, yet there was more here than I ever would have expected. The chaplain started explaining how grief happens not only when we lose someone close to us, like Nana Willard, but anytime we lose something we've had a signifigant relationship with or attatchment to. Sometimes something as miner as a change in location or job can also trigger feelings of greif. Over the past two or three weeks, my life had gone through some signifigant changes: I had lost a grandmother, moved to a new city, changed jobs, gotten in a car accident (not my fault), not having as much free time due to the job change, having to change churches due to the location change and the distance between my firnds and I getting geographically bigger. All that came out to a Mike Willard who wasn't feeling his absolute best. Sitting in that classroom, I felt a release of sorts. I was going through a lot. It's okay to feel a bit out of it at times like this. It was like the Holy Spirit was speaking to me from inside my heart saying those often quoted words by Brennan Manning, "It's okay. I'm here. I love you and I'm for you." It was really good to hear that in such an unexpected place and time.

Friends of God

Over the past week I have become increasingly thankful for the friends God has surrounded me with. I have come to see them as Faithful Reminders In Ever Dependent Service of God. Yes, that was an intentional anacronym. My friends are those who know me best, even better than myself at times, yet still love and enjoy being around me. The same can be said of my relationship with them. In that sense, we are living reminders to each other of all that we see in God. In our relationships to each other, we can also be to the world a visible living reminder of God's loving and faithful presence. Doesn't John say as much in his first epistle (1Jn 4:20)? Let us love each other than as Christ has loved us. Let us be the living reminders that God made us to be!

Of Labels and Names

Lately I've found myself think a lot about labels and names. For a while now I have had a love / hate relationship with labels. I hate it when people use them to box in or attempt to catagorize myself and those I care about. On the other hand, I love it when I can use a label as a lense through which to better understand a person. For example, when I hear people refer to me as a "Christian guy", I know that phrasing means different things to different people. To some it means, "insensitive, in-your-face, bible-thumper" while to others it means "sensative caring person who what's what's best for you". The latter, even though it is more more posative, is no more closer to the truth than the former. Even if I was to give you my own definition, that would still not totally traverse what it means for me to be both a follower of Christ and a male member of the human species.
It's like that passage in the Gospels where Jesus asks His disciples who the crowds say He is and then who they say He is. At the same time, I also find myself reminded of a conversation I once had with an uncle of mine. We hadn't seen each other in a while and I could sense He was trying to get a sense of who I was, of what kind of person I was, and so on. Maybe I was under the wrong impression, but I still found myself turning to him and saying, "Don't try to understand me, just get to know me." Do you get the difference yet?
One way to find out about another person is to simply notice certain charecteristics they share with other members of the human race and assume that because they do, they are just like those other people. In my mind, viewing relationships and conversations that way stunts true growth and developement of one's self and others around you. A second way to approach another person is to see each charecteristic as adding to the uniqueness of that person's whole identity.
The truth of the matter, at least as I have come to see it, is that God created each of us in His image as unique representations of Who He is. There is no one else in the world quite like you. There is no one else in the world quite like me. How could there be? We have all lived different lives and had a variety of opposite expereinces. Maybe we'd be better off getting to know each other by name than by label. Just a thought. Hope you are all well. God bless each of you!

A New Chapter Begins

Once again the time has come for rumor confirmation. Some of you know my recent good news and some of you don't. For those to whom this is news, as of October 4th, 2004 I will be employed as a resident chaplain at the V.A Center in St. Cloud, MN. Due to the nature of my new job, this will require another move. And I am just barely getting out of the boxes from the last one. Oh the joys ;-) In addition, because of the distance from St. Paul to St. Cloud (at least 90 min. on a good day) it will also mean finding a new church and gathering a new crew of friends. Not that I wish to lose any of my present friendships. I do need to acknowledge the strain that the distance will put on our continued relationship though. All this to say that once again, for about the umpteenth time in my life, it feels like I'm beginning all over again.

And yet some things will stay the same. Everything I've learned along the way, all the growth changes that I have incurred over the years. In a sense, it won't be me, but my surroundings that do the changing, yet some personal growth is bound to occur along the way. In a way this kind of relates to some things I've been thinking a lot about this month.

I use to not really understand what was being talked about when someone said," The real personality of someone comes out only under conflict." or some variation of that statement. I mean, wouldn't it make sense that the real person is the one we see day in and day out, not the one who only crops up when things get really bad? Or would it? After being around a number of people in and out of conflict and going through a few myself, I think I can see what that old saying is getting at. When life gets rough and things stop going our way, that's when the masks come off. That's when the inner core that we've been developing this whole time really comes through. Incidentally, it's also the time when God can really do His deepest work. It’s times like these that when we are forced to come to grips with the fact that we are not the ones really in control, He is.

This is what really excites me about getting into chaplaincy again. Hard times when God really moves in the lives of His people are what these men and women deal with every day. And I will soon be joining them! The particular site I’ve been assigned to works more with long and extended term care cases as well as rehabilitation, addiction and otherwise. That means I’ll be able to work with them both when they’re in crisis mode and when they’re beginning to recover and the masks are being donned once more.

In addition, many of you know that it has been a long time belief of mine that each person on this earth, at the core of his or her being, has been created in the image of God. Therefore, when you get to know another human being at that deep a level, you are also getting to know God more. As a chaplain, I will have a number of these encounters throughout my day. That was certainly my experience while being a chaplain at Ebenezer Hall a year ago and that experience will only be intensified when I start doing it eight hours a day and forty hours a week.

To be really honest, part of me is genuinely excited about these new prospects of life and ministry. At the same time, part of me is really anxious too. “Who am I under pressure?” has been a question constantly on my mind throughout these past shifting months. Is the person that I have been becoming throughout all these years of formation really ready for some hands on tough ministry? When those questions and more come barging through the door of my mind and conscience, it’s truly a comfort to know I’m not the only one doing the sculpting. God’s in the mix too and His are the Hands the ultimately shape all the rest of what’s going on in my life. If it wasn’t His invitation that I’m accepting by entering into this new chapter, then why would I have the peace about it that I do? Why would those who’ve been praying for me all through this time, also have His peace? Why would there be good apartments a plenty to choose from? Why would I have been offered the job in the first place, if God was not in the offering? If this is really God’s direction that I’m following, and I do believe it is, then He’s confident that I can handle it. He knows that I know it is by His Spirit in me that I can do all the things He has called me to do. That is a very comforting thought!

Well, I can tell that I’ve already gone on long enough and I haven’t even included a poem or song for the month, so before I forget, here’s another Switchfoot one that’s been ringing through my head:

Meant To Live

Fumbling his confidence
And wondering why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he's bent for more than arguments
And failed attempts to fly, fly

[Chorus]
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

Dreaming about Providence
And whether mice or men have second tries
Maybe we've been living with our eyes half open
Maybe we're bent and broken, broken

[Chorus]

We want more than this world's got to offer
We want more than this world's got to offer
We want more than the wars of our fathers
And everything inside screams for second life, yeah

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live
We were meant to live

Thanks for coming by again. I hope you enjoyed and learned from what was shared. Feel free to drop by again next month or anytime between. I pray all is well with each of you and the God will continue to draw you ever deeper in the true Love and Reality that is Himself.

In His Grip,
Michel Jon Willard

Rantings of a soon to be former retail employee

I think it was my pastor, Barry Jass, who first spoke of how the modern world seems to have lost most of it's courtesy and replaced it with efficiancy. Over the last 7 months at Panera and 1 year at Border's a few years before, I have come to see this as blazingly true. A huge majority of the people I serve expect expediant service with a smile, even when the employees, like myself are under a large amount of pressure. Say, for instance the 16th person in a 30+ person line, wants a very specific order and s/he becoms irrate and surpirsed when the employee messes up a single aspect or, horror of horrors, needs part of the the order repeated because s/he didn't get totally the first time. The patiant and helpful customer seems a rarity at best, and yet they all expect us to be cheerfully efficiant. Of course I understand if some of the spicifics are health related, but most of the time this simply is not the case. Never mind the fact that most of the time, we're barely paid enough to live off of. Panera pays me $7.72 p/h and Borders paid $6.50p/h. Oh, the injustice of it all ;-)

Seriously though. I do think we, as Christians, need to set the example and raise the bar on how we treat others, Whether they are fellow Christians or not. It shouldn't matter if you will never see this person again in your life, they are still a beloved creation of God whom He longs to know more deeply, and your kindness may help to open the way for another's witness. So, here are a few suggestions to ponder the next time you're waiting in line:

1. Remeber, above all else, the person behind the counter is just as much a human being as you are and deserves to be treated as such,

2. If you manage to get a customer service rep. who really does everything exactly the way you like it and smiles cheerfully the whole time through, do be impressed. You are truly in the presence of a living miracle. Such a person deserves, at the least, a good tip.

3. Be gracious and patiant while the employee takes your order and carries it out. S/he has probably had a long day full of busy, pushy customers and the last thing they need is another one.

In closing, let me remind of one of the lessons Jesus taight us: Love one another as I have loved you (Jn 13:34-35). He loved you enough to come and serve you by dying on your behalf and He calls you to do likewise for your brothers and sisters. Think on that, the next time you find yourself in a rather long line with your patiance running thin. I hope you are all well. God bless each of you!

Of Jesus and Human Nature

The more I think about, the less I am inclined to agree with the common Christian belief that we are all inherently sinful from birth. I really started to have issues with this when I was doing a research paper on the Humanity of Jesus Christ. A commom issue among the theolgians I read was how to deal with Christ's dual nature and specifically how to deal with it in respect to temptation and sin. The question was could Jesus have sinned and the overwhelming answer was in His humanity, yes. In His Divity, no. In addition, there seemed to be a prevailent beleif that Jesus' humanity was differnt from ours. Ours is inherently sinful, His is pure through and through. Yet if that holds true, wouldn't it go against Hebrews 4:15, which says that Jesus was tempted in every way we are? How could He have been tempted in every way in which we are if, at His core, He does not expereince temptation the same way we do? Maybe Jesus had exactly the same kind of human nature we do. Maybe we just don't fully comprehend our own nature.

So, if I don't buy the whole sin nature thing, what do I believe about our human nature? I think Abraham Joshua Heschel put it best: "It is because we are made in the image of God that our righteousness is expected, yet it is because we were made from the dust of the earth thast our inequeties are forgiven." Heschel postulates that we are, in fact, trinitarain beings. On the one hand we were made in the image of God. We are divine creations. On the other hand, we were created from the dust of the earth. We are only human. Both of these aspects come into play wth the third, that we were made for a relationship with God.

I think Jesus had the same humanity that we do. When He took on human form, He took on a nature that was created in the image of God and made from the dust of the earth. If He was different in any respect, I would say it was in the third. Jesus had a relationship with His Father unlike anyone else who has walked this earth. There was nothing He did apart from God (John 8:28). In everything He was wholly dependant upon God. That is what makes Him what He is and that is when He offers us. A way to become wholly what we were meant to be from the beginning. In loving dependant relationtionship with God. What's more, I think that as we grow in this relationship, one of the by-products will be a lessoning in sin. Not through conscious effort, but simply because we no longer desire it. Sin offers itself as a substitute for God and the more we allow God into our lives, the less sin space sin will have.

Well, those are my thoughts as they currently stand. Any comments?

On Men & Women

A complaint I often here from women is this: Why can't men get past the physical? This, of course is voiced in different forms, like, "All men are interested in is T&A" or other wordings. Yet the issue is the same, we men do have a troubles getting past a woman's outer appearence.There are whole industreis build on catering to this taste. However, I don't think we're alone in this issue. Over the years I've noticed something similar in women. At the risk of simplifying the issue way to much, let me start by phrasing the issue like this: Men are to the ideal physical felmale form as women are to the romantic one. Many women think rightly that men have a perfect women in our minds that they will never be able to measure up to. Maybe I'm just being a cynical male, but I think it's the same way with them. They have such an high romantic ideal that we ordinary guys would never stand a chance. I think, maybe, we both need to come back down to earth and realize the reality of the situation. There are no perfect men and women. The ideals we've built up in our heads simply do not exist in real life. To go the Christian route, they are idols that we need to get rid of. They are clouding our view of who each other really is and not allowing us to see each other for who we trully are: beloved children of our heavenly Father.
None of this is meant to excuse either men or women, just to put forth some thoughts. I hope you are all well. God bless!

Mike&Eva

Mike&Eva,
originally uploaded by Malachi77.

Mike in Hat

Mike in Hat,
originally uploaded by Malachi77.

Mike's Musings

• Mike’s Musings (7/31/04) •

Dear family & friends,

• The Time Between, pt. 2

Another month has passed and not much has changed. I’m still at Panera, though due to an hour shortage they have been unable to give me full time hours or raise my wage beyond its current Associate minimum. So, for about a few months now I’ve been searching for both a job and a ministry position. It feels a bit odd, to say the least. I do have some pending job opportunities I’m waiting to hear back from, but I’ve also already gotten a few “redirection” letters and calls. I say “redirection” because none of them have out right rejected me, instead, they praised my accomplishments, yet stated that I simply “was not the right man for the job.” Maybe I’m just being optimistic.

Anyway, the whole thing has gotten me thinking a lot about discipleship and our mental transformation as Christians (Romans 12:2). The more I learn and read about discipleship and spiritual formation, the more I am seeing it as standing in direct opposition to the American culture which I grew up in and which is still very present today. Maybe even worse. What specifically am I talking about? Well, it’s hard to know where to begin, but over the past month, what I’ve found myself struggling with again and again is my often over-bearing need for immediate satisfaction. In this culture of “why wait, when you can get what you want right now?” I find myself a bit perplexed because what I really want – i.e. lasting deeply felt peace, joy and love between God and myself – is not instantaneously accessible.

What I really long for is to be who I am ultimately meant to be, to have the ministry position I was made for and which God is calling me towards right now. What I am finding myself come face to face with on a daily basis is that I am just not ready yet for such a position. Not that Bethel Seminary hasn’t done an excellent job of preparing me for ministry, they have. Not that I’ve made an irreparable errors along the way that have kept me out of the running, I haven’t. It’s more like what God has in store for me is going to take every ounce of strength, energy and spiritual depth that I’ve grown over the years and have yet to grow and He doesn’t want to bring me into it before I’m ready. Yet, as I mentioned before, I find myself hopeful and optimistic. Why? Read on!!

It occurs to me that those things I really long for are truly the things I desire above all else exactly because they are designed to be achieved over the long haul. The peace, joy, and love that God offers us would not even be close to the same thing, if we could get them right now, as they are. We’re asking for mere tokens when God longs to give us treasure troves. I am reminded of a Jewish parable I once heard of where heaven and hell were describe. Both were equally adorned dinning rooms filled with every kind of food and beverage imaginable. Both were immaculate and splendid in their place settings and dishes. Then the guests came for dinner, and we find that they look exactly like us except for one thing. Their arms are locked at the elbows. Both groups find themselves in the same predicament of being unable to feed themselves. Now the feast begins and we finally see what distinguishes heaven from hell. In hell, food and dishes are flying everywhere as people continually persist in the impossible task of feeding themselves. In heaven, we find people serving each other and eating from each other’s hands. So we see that it is not the environment, nor the outer circumstances of the inhabitants, but what comes from the inside, that make heaven and hell what they are, This servant’s attitude comes not from a behavior enforced system, but from an inner peace grown during years of experiencing God’s faithfulness.

That I believe is a picture of what God is preparing me for even now. Yet I do not think He loves me any less now than He will on that day. Yes, it is true, I am not right at this moment all I am meant to be, but it is utterly crucial that I be exactly where I am now in order to attain that future glory. You see, God sees each of us as a story and He is the master storyteller. Every point has its reason and everything its season. God sees me exactly as I am today and loves me just the same.

As these thoughts have been stumbling around in my mind with them two songs have been intertwined. For the sake of disk space, I will only include their lyrics here, but will gladly loan the cd’s to anyone who asks.

Steady as She Goes
I see the thunderheads gather
In the northern sky
In the threatening tide
‘Cause my port side’s heavy
With the worries of life
And the worries of dying
On the starboard side

Well, I wonder am I really
Stout-hearted enough?
‘Cause the ocean is rolling
And these waters are rough
There’s a storm cloud brewing
In the sky above
So let my vessel be sturdy
Let my anchor be tough

Chorus: ‘Cause the clouds are known to gather
And the wind is prone to blow
I’ll keep her stead as a river
When the wild wind comes to blow
I’ve already been delivered
So I’ll keep her steady as she goes

Well, I shiver in the wake of the raging storm
And my rigging is tattered
And the sails are torn
I may cast this cargo overboard
But I ain’t setting my headings
For no change in course

Chorus

When you can’t find the faith the slumber
When you’re thrown by every swell
You know that you’re not going under
With the Captain at the helm
-Andrew Peterson, Clear to Venus

This is Your Life
Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
Yesterday is a promise that you've broken
Don't close your eyes, don't close your eyes
This is your life and today is all you've got now
Yeah, and today is all you'll ever have
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be?
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose?

Yesterday is a kid in the corner
Yesterday is dead and over

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose?

Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes

This is your life are you who you want to be?
This is your life are you who you want to be?

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose?

And you had everything to lose?
-Switchfoot, The Beautiful Letdown

Well, that’s it for now. Thanks for coming by again. With grateful prayers and loving thoughts of your ever gracious return, I bid you adu. I hope you are each well. God bless!
In His Grip,

Michel Jon Willard