Monday, February 07, 2005

Mike's Musings (2/5/05)

• Mike’s Musings (02/05/05) •

Dear family & friends,

• Life Update

If I had to sum up this month in one word, it would be simply “expectations.” One of the decisions I made upon coming back to work after Christmas was to become more active in my role as a Chaplain Resident at the V.A. Medical Center. In doing so though, I came upon a rather big problem. I found I was a bit unclear on what that role was exactly. In attempting to decipher it, I realized that part of my problem was that I work with and for a number of different supervisors and co-workers, each of whom had their own expectations of what I am supposed to be doing. Never mind that I had my own expectations of what my job was to be like and was constantly in prayer to discern what God’s expectations were. To make matters worse, while many of these expectations were compatible, some of them weren’t. While I know God’s expectations should always over rule the rest, at times I found myself struggling to hear His still, quiet voice above the roar of all the others.

• Sharing My Journey: Finding Security in My Identity with Christ

In working through this predicament, I finally began to hear God’s voice speaking into and through it. My heart began to feel His invitation to stop letting others define who I am called to be and just listen to Him. Not that my identity in Him is totally at odds with all the expectations coming my way, though at times it felt like that, but that being secure in Him would give the strong foundation in and from which to judge everything else that came my way. In Christ, I am known as God’s beloved child who He will care for and protect. This gives me the confidence to move out in faith trusting in Him for wisdom and guidance as I press on to know that which He is calling me towards in Christ Jesus. As I continue to discern His call on my life, I pray, and ask you to pray with and for me, that I will continue to move towards and minister to those He has called me to with the utmost grace and compassion. To care for them as I know He is caring for me. Pray that the themes that have come to characterize my life these years - those of Authenticity, Compassion, and Faithfulness – will continue to mark every aspect of all that I do. Thanks!

For this months poetic selection, I think I may have gone a little overboard. I guess it feels like my words have been a bit jumbled this month, so maybe my art will speak what my mouth cannot. I wrote the first to describe the kind of ministry I felt God was calling me into and still struggle to understand. The middle three describe what my heart is like during this time, for it is the wellspring of my life (Proverbs 4:23). The last is a blessing I wrote last year during Life & Theology of Prayer. It was written for a friend going through struggles, and though it was directed towards the male perspective, I think it could be a somewhat universal blessing.

Hate Sin, Love Sinner
She stares at me through the lenses of her half-priced glasses
All I feel wells up inside me in love,
Yet her lifestyle is of sin
Still He calls me to let her in,
Into my heart, into my world.

Though she has a different companion every night,
Still He calls me to love her with all my might.

(Chorus)
Hate the sin but love the sinner,
That’s what we all should do.
Love the sinner, but hate the sin,
Is what He calls us to do.

He sits in a jailhouse apartment.
A cell which has no windows.
Steel bars his only companions.
He’s on death-row for his past,
Yet a Bible sits by his side.

(Chorus)

They lie in their beds
Both terminally waiting to be dead,
Without a hope for anything,
Yet I stand at their side knowing the Hope for everything.
They had joined in ways not meant to be,
But He calls me to love them as I do me,
And as their minds fill with anguish and sorrow for their sin,
I hear Him again, “Let them in.”

(Chorus)

I could go on for verse after verse,
And still not totally converse,
That which He has placed in my heart,
And which I, in prayer, must start.
We must love the sinner, but hate the sin.
(Chorus)

Remember, my friends, what ever else you may forget.
What ever else you do and may live to regret.
Though sin is from Satan,
The sinner is a child of God
The sinner is a child of God.

(Chorus).

Born Cracked
Born into the world a cracked vessel needing to be filled
The world she offers many things to fill it
Yet I always come back wanting more
Each thing feels right at first
But in time they all turn up lacking

Back in the garden we knew what it was to be filled
Back in the garden we knew what it was to be loved
Back in the garden we knew what it was to be accepted
Dear God why did we ever turn away from You the True Source

Cursed to walk this world abandoned, though we are never alone
You pursue us day and night yet still we run
Unable to turn, unable to be filled
Until by grace You extend the hand
And turn us around in Your Embrace

The cross makes this possible
The blood of Jesus fills our cracked vessel
His Blood seals the crack
In Him we are filled
In Him we are loved
In Him we are accepted

Though I know of His Love for me
Though I have soaked in the blood
Still my vessel leaks
Many are the times I know not filling
Many are the times I know not love
Many are the times I know not acceptance

Why is this the case?
Dear God, extend Your Hand
Dear God, send down Your Grace
Turn me around full in Your Embrace.

You Desire?
The jailer called for lights, rushed in and fell trembling before Paul and Silas. 30 He then brought them out and asked, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?”
They replied, “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved —you and your household.”
-Acts 16:29-31

Just believe and you will be saved.
Yet even the demons believe in Christ and they certainly will not be saved
So what is it that You require?
What is it that you desire?
A heart undivided full of fire?
Will that be enough to inspire?

No, my spirit says, You want more
More than a life filled with good works
More than all the money I can earn
More than my first born son
So much more than I can ever give
And yet the answer is simple

You do not want my heart
You do not want my works
You do not want my family
All you really want is me
All of me

My Heart
Lord, I give you my heart
All I am
All I have ever been
And ever hope to be
All I have done and ever plan to do
All I am and ever wanted to be
You are the One I was created for
Why have I searched so long for more
In You all my hopes are met
In You all my desires are satisfied
In You, at last, my heart has found
it's home.


A Blessing for the Man of God
Fall upon this man, O God of our Fathers
May Your Presence surround him
Command Your angels to encamp about him
That the arrows of the enemy may ever fail and fall short

Guard his heart
May Your streams of living water flow ever from her
Keep her undivided in her focus
Ever attentive to You, her Lord and King

Take captive his mind for you, O Holy Spirit
Renew, rewire, and reconfigure it
May it be no longer conformed to this world
Transform it with Your ever Refining Fire
May Your Peace fill his life

Direct the paths of his soul
Recapture it with Your love
Keep it healthy and ever devoted to You
You, O Jesus, Lover of his soul

Take Your Blood, O Jesus, and cleanse his eyes
May your living water flow over them, washing away all remnants of sin
Keep them pure, O Jesus, for they are the portals of all within

Keep his ears attuned to You, O Holy Spirit
Help him discern Your Voice among all those waging for his attention

May Your Words be ever upon his lips, O Lord
May his mouth hang open expectantly
Longing for Your Command

Break free his hands and feet for their shackles
May they be swift and beautiful for Thee

By the way, they’re all from my collection this month ;-) Thank you again, each of you, so much for letting me share my life and ministry in this way. I pray you are blessed and drawn closer to our Loving Father through its reading. Certainly, I know I was in its writing. This month, I’ll be leading the Protestant service at the V.A. on February 13th. The service starts at 9:30 am and all are welcome to come. That also means I’ll get the following Friday off (the 18th and I would love to spend that weekend with some of you down in St. Paul or wherever. Just let me know what works best for you and I’ll see what I can do. I hope you are all doing well. May God’s presence tangibly touch each of your lives during this month.