A New Chapter Begins

Once again the time has come for rumor confirmation. Some of you know my recent good news and some of you don't. For those to whom this is news, as of October 4th, 2004 I will be employed as a resident chaplain at the V.A Center in St. Cloud, MN. Due to the nature of my new job, this will require another move. And I am just barely getting out of the boxes from the last one. Oh the joys ;-) In addition, because of the distance from St. Paul to St. Cloud (at least 90 min. on a good day) it will also mean finding a new church and gathering a new crew of friends. Not that I wish to lose any of my present friendships. I do need to acknowledge the strain that the distance will put on our continued relationship though. All this to say that once again, for about the umpteenth time in my life, it feels like I'm beginning all over again.

And yet some things will stay the same. Everything I've learned along the way, all the growth changes that I have incurred over the years. In a sense, it won't be me, but my surroundings that do the changing, yet some personal growth is bound to occur along the way. In a way this kind of relates to some things I've been thinking a lot about this month.

I use to not really understand what was being talked about when someone said," The real personality of someone comes out only under conflict." or some variation of that statement. I mean, wouldn't it make sense that the real person is the one we see day in and day out, not the one who only crops up when things get really bad? Or would it? After being around a number of people in and out of conflict and going through a few myself, I think I can see what that old saying is getting at. When life gets rough and things stop going our way, that's when the masks come off. That's when the inner core that we've been developing this whole time really comes through. Incidentally, it's also the time when God can really do His deepest work. It’s times like these that when we are forced to come to grips with the fact that we are not the ones really in control, He is.

This is what really excites me about getting into chaplaincy again. Hard times when God really moves in the lives of His people are what these men and women deal with every day. And I will soon be joining them! The particular site I’ve been assigned to works more with long and extended term care cases as well as rehabilitation, addiction and otherwise. That means I’ll be able to work with them both when they’re in crisis mode and when they’re beginning to recover and the masks are being donned once more.

In addition, many of you know that it has been a long time belief of mine that each person on this earth, at the core of his or her being, has been created in the image of God. Therefore, when you get to know another human being at that deep a level, you are also getting to know God more. As a chaplain, I will have a number of these encounters throughout my day. That was certainly my experience while being a chaplain at Ebenezer Hall a year ago and that experience will only be intensified when I start doing it eight hours a day and forty hours a week.

To be really honest, part of me is genuinely excited about these new prospects of life and ministry. At the same time, part of me is really anxious too. “Who am I under pressure?” has been a question constantly on my mind throughout these past shifting months. Is the person that I have been becoming throughout all these years of formation really ready for some hands on tough ministry? When those questions and more come barging through the door of my mind and conscience, it’s truly a comfort to know I’m not the only one doing the sculpting. God’s in the mix too and His are the Hands the ultimately shape all the rest of what’s going on in my life. If it wasn’t His invitation that I’m accepting by entering into this new chapter, then why would I have the peace about it that I do? Why would those who’ve been praying for me all through this time, also have His peace? Why would there be good apartments a plenty to choose from? Why would I have been offered the job in the first place, if God was not in the offering? If this is really God’s direction that I’m following, and I do believe it is, then He’s confident that I can handle it. He knows that I know it is by His Spirit in me that I can do all the things He has called me to do. That is a very comforting thought!

Well, I can tell that I’ve already gone on long enough and I haven’t even included a poem or song for the month, so before I forget, here’s another Switchfoot one that’s been ringing through my head:

Meant To Live

Fumbling his confidence
And wondering why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he's bent for more than arguments
And failed attempts to fly, fly

[Chorus]
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

Dreaming about Providence
And whether mice or men have second tries
Maybe we've been living with our eyes half open
Maybe we're bent and broken, broken

[Chorus]

We want more than this world's got to offer
We want more than this world's got to offer
We want more than the wars of our fathers
And everything inside screams for second life, yeah

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live
We were meant to live

Thanks for coming by again. I hope you enjoyed and learned from what was shared. Feel free to drop by again next month or anytime between. I pray all is well with each of you and the God will continue to draw you ever deeper in the true Love and Reality that is Himself.

In His Grip,
Michel Jon Willard