Meaningful Words (3/7/09)

I guess the real question is, can I be thankful for “Minnesota Nice”? In pondering this, I find myself thankful for the people in my life that call Minnesota their home. However, sometimes I wish they could understand that I really don’t need them to be so “nice” to me. I work to be gracious when I am confronted with my own mistakes and defects and hope that they learn from my example. It does hurt when people don’t think well of me or when I have to face the consequences of my own mistakes, yet it hurts even more when I find that the people who have a problem with me can’t bring themselves to say so to my face. Truly, I don’t bite ;-) After all, Jesus once said, “If your brother sins against you,a go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector” (Matthew 18:15-17).” That is the model for how we should work with others.

Here are two poems that I have found helpful in learning to be thankful in my relations with people and one poem of my own

Take Time
Take time to think...
it is the source of power.

Take time to play...
it is the secret of perpetual youth.

Take time to pray...
it is the greatest power on earth.

Take time to love and be loved...
it is a God-given privilege.

Take time to be friendly...
it is the road to happiness.

Take time to laugh...
it is the music of the soul.

Take time to give...
it is too short a day to be selfish.

Take time to work...
it is the price of success.

Take time to do charity...
it is the key to heaven.

Author Unknown

The Serenity Prayer
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

--Reinhold Niebuhr


Let Go
The Father:
I invite you, My child, to let go.
Let go of your need to worry,
for it really does you no good.
Let go of your need to control,
for you really have none.
Let go of your need for a plan,
for I am all you really ever need!

I invite you, My child, to let Me in.
Let Me into your concerns,
for I can bear your load.
Let Me into your life,
for I do know what I am doing.
Let Me into your heart,
for I am the One you were created for.

I invite you, My child,
to know the truth.
Know that I care for you and I will see to your needs.
Know that I am taking care of them even now.
Know that I am Your Faithful Father.

His Child:
Lord, help me to trust when I don’t want to trust
Lord, help me to love when I don’t want to love
Lord, help to give, when I don’t want to give
To give my life to You.

For you, Oh Lord, are the Lover of my soul
Yes, You, Oh Lord, are faithful.
Yes, You, Oh Lord, will watch over me
And care for me better than I ever could.

As I close out this letter, I do find myself extremely grateful for each of you and all of the people God has place in my life over the years. I know that God has shown me so much in my relationships with each of you and I pray He has blessed you through them as well.

Sharing My Life (3/7/09): Entitlement

Living in Maple Grove and working with clients who live in and around the Twin Cities area often means that I’ve got a bit of a commute in the morning. Often, as I’m driving in, I listen to talk radio to hear the news of the day. When I listen to people’s reaction to our times, I hear a lot of entitlement. People see injustice all around and look to the government or others to fix the problems, even when they themselves may be the real cause of the problems in their lives. We so often find it easier to look outside than within.

One of the biggest changes I have noticed in my life since beginning to work a recovery program has been the sharp decrease in my sense of entitlement. I used to get mad at my teachers for giving me so much work, mad at my supervisors for expecting so much of me, mad at my friends for not being there when I needed them, the list goes on. I was even mad at God, sometimes for being so elusive about His will for my life. Yet over the past few years, I have found myself learning to trade entitlement for gratefulness. Now I am beginning to see the work people give me, the expectations they may have of me, and the presence of my friends in my life and things to be so thankful for. God has indeed blessed me richly over the years, and to me, feeling entitled to it, robs it of it’s true work. As James, the brother of Christ, writes,” Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change” (James 1:17).

Life Update (3/7/09): "Minnesota Nice"?

I have lived in Minnesota now for a little over eight years and still find this trait of people here a bit frustrating. When I was living on the East Coast, in New Jersey and Massachusetts, I got used to people being pretty straight-forward with me, yet here it’s different. Many times I encounter people who are nice enough at first, but I later find out they could actually care less. This is most frustrating in the work environment. I will have clients who are very cordial and friendly with me, yet constantly critique my work to my supervisors. A few of my friends are sometimes like this, but I’m learning to confront this in my clients, supervisors and friends by learning to be consistently honest. If I have a problem with them, I am working to take it up with them, instead of letting it stew in my subconscious. If I make a mistake, I own up to it as soon as I become aware of it, instead of waiting for others to point it out. I can’t change the way others are, but I can work on changing myself through submitting to God’s work in my life and hope that they see this and desire for Him to work in their lives as well.