As I look back upon the last month, I find myself unexpectedly thankful. I say that because the amount of expectations and responsibilities entailed in my current job have not changed that much. Though I have brought up their overabundance to my supervisors numerous times. The amount of other things going on in my life feels like it’s actually increased. Many of the issues I was facing last month are still here this month. Yet amidst all this I feel a quiet peace of assurance and strength. Like He has so many times before, God refused to take away the things that cause me stress in my life. Instead He used them to push me to turn to Him and find in my reliance upon Him, the strength I need to get through it all. It is like what Paul said in the twelfth chapter of his second letter to the Corinthian church when he was wrestling with a thorn that God would not take away no matter how often Paul complained. In the midst of Paul’s struggle, Jesus met him and said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2Cor 12: 9). Many were the times this month I found God saying those same words to me, even from the mouths of my supervisors, co-workers and friends, who I needed to hear it from the most.
Paul also talks about how this works with temptation back in his first letter to the Corinthians, in chapter 10. To be honest I have often struggled with this passage because I have found that sometimes God does give us more than we can bear. And He does so on purpose. Yet in the midst of my struggles, I think I have found why He does this. He does it to build our dependence upon Him. In my own life I have found that the burdens of life are certainly way too overbearing for me. Yet when I turn to Him and rely on His strength to get through Him, I find myself often astounded at what we can do together.
Just over the past week, God has brought the theme of forgiveness up in my life again. The particular issues are still a bit personal for me right now, but I can share with you a general principle I am learning. Forgiveness is not a one-time thing. When someone hurts me deeply, it is not like I can forgive him or her and be done with it. No! It’s more like Shrek’s onion personality. Every time I am reminded of this person or incident, I have to forgive them again. Every time it comes up, a new level of hurt arises that I did not realize was there before. Yet like above, each time I find the strength I need from God when I turn to Him, to get through it and even, sometimes, to see His work in it.
For poems this month, I’ll share an old favorite on the theme of forgiveness and a newer one on finding God’s strength amidst the trials of life:
The Father:
I have already forgiven your sin.
Why do you bring it before Me again?
I have already washed you clean.
Why do you insist on playing in the dirt?
Accept My forgiveness.
Receive My cleansing.
Why do you cling to that which I have already released you from?
Why do you remain in the dungeon?
The chains have already been broken and the key thrown away.
The gates of iron have been flung wide open
And yet still you cower in this cage of your own making
The light has been shown forth
Yet you prefer the darkness
What more can I do for you, My child?
How else can I bid you come?
The table has already been set and the dinner bell is ringing
Is it possible you have not heard Me calling?
Answer Me and I will give you the desires of your heart.
I am your Father and have always been faithful.
Is this not the truth?
Listen to your heart, My child.
You know Who I am.
You have always known.
His Child:
Come unto me, O Desire of my heart!
Beckon me unto Your Feast, O Satisfier of my deepest hunger!
Dance with Me, O Romancer of my soul!
Set me beside the still waters, O Author of my peace!
Run with me, O my Ever True Companion
Guide my steps, O Victorious Winner of the race set before me!
You Who began this good work in me,
You are my Faithful Father
And You will finish what You have started!
Yes, You will finish what you have started!
When Sorrow Abounds
When sorrow abounds
Let Your Love surround us
When the cry of our broken hearts rings from the depths
Incline Your ear, O Lord, and listen to our breaths
You are Jesus, Bearer of our grief
You are our Savior, our only relief
You are God, the Father of all comfort
In this our time of need, be not our last resort
You are the Holy Spirit, Who dwells in our heart
From Your life may we never depart
We are Your children, the sheep of Your fold
Come, O God, fall upon us manifold
We need Your saving grace
Enfold us Father in Your embrace
We need Your Truth from Your Word
Come, Spirit, and penetrate us with Your sword
In You we find life
And solace for our strife
In You we find forgiveness
And strength in our weakness
And though Your gift costs us nothing,
We can never be the same.
For everything changes in the presence of Your Name
You are love and life enfleshed
In You our hearts will never be famished
In You is everything we need
In our hearts, come, plant Your seed
Let Your Spirit dwell within us
Be our heart and soul focus
We are Your children, the sheep of Your hand
Thanks again for letting me share my life with you in this venue. I pray God will bless you in reading it as He blessed m in writing it. This month I will not get a chance to head down to St. Paul for an extended period because I have been asked to preach for Easter Sunday here at the V.A. However, next month I think I’ll be down there twice: April 1-3 and 15-17. Let me know if any of you are interested in hanging out either of those two weekends and I will see what I can
make work! I hope you are all doing well. God bless each of you!
Michel Jon Willard
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