Meaningful Words (9/26/07)

In beginning to plan my Ordination Service, I have been think a lot about the poems, songs and scriptures that have shaped my life and ministry. Here are a few of the poems I’ve thought of:

Be Still
“Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”
-Psalm 46:10

Be still, My child and know that you are loved.
Endless, limitless, eternal love is yours.
My Son paid the price and you are free to come.

Come and know Me
Come and know that you are loved.
Come with no expectations, for they will all be blown away.
Come with no preparations, the price has already been paid
Come with no restrictions for they are only self-imposed
Come desiring nothing, knowing you will receive all that is of true worth.

I am the One Who has loved you since before time began
As you were formed within your mother’s womb
I knew you and called you My chosen one
You are My child and I love you.

Forgiven
The Father:
I have already forgiven your sin.
Why do you bring it before Me again?

I have already washed you clean.
Why do you insist on playing in the dirt?

Accept My forgiveness.
Receive My cleansing.

Why do you cling to that which I have already released you from?
Why do you remain in the dungeon?
The chains have already been broken and the key thrown away.

The gates of iron have been flung wide open
And yet still you cower in this cage of your own making

The light has been shown forth
Yet you prefer the darkness

What more can I do for you, My child?

How else can I bid you come?
The table has already been set and the dinner bell is ringing
Is it possible you have not heard Me calling?

Answer Me and I will give you the desires of your heart.
I am your Father and have always been faithful.
Is this not the truth?
Listen to your heart, My child.
You know Who I am.
You have always known.

His Child:
Come unto me, O Desire of my heart!
Beckon me unto Your Feast, O Satisfier of my deepest hunger!
Dance with Me, O Romancer of my soul!
Set me beside the still waters, O Author of my peace!
Run with me, O my Ever True Companion
Guide my steps, O Victorious Winner of the race set before me!

You Who began this good work in me,
You are my Faithful Father
And You will finish what You have started!
Yes, You will finish what you have started!

Born Cracked
Born into the world a cracked vessel needing to be filled
The world she offers many things to fill it
Yet I always come back wanting more
Each thing feels right at first
But in time they all turn up lacking

Back in the garden we knew what it was to be filled
Back in the garden we knew what it was to be loved
Back in the garden we knew what it was to be accepted
Dear God why did we ever turn away from You the True Source

Cursed to walk this world abandoned, though we are never alone
You pursue us day and night yet still we run
Unable to turn, unable to be filled
Until by grace You extend the hand
And turn us around in Your Embrace

The cross makes this possible
The blood of Jesus fills our cracked vessel
His Blood seals the crack
In Him we are filled
In Him we are loved
In Him we are accepted

Though I know of His Love for me
Though I have soaked in the blood
Still my vessel leaks
Many are the times I know not filling
Many are the times I know not love
Many are the times I know not acceptance

Why is this the case?
Dear God, extend Your Hand
Dear God, send down Your Grace
Turn me around full in Your Embrace.

Let Go
The Father:
I invite you, My child, to let go.
Let go of your need to worry,
for it really does you no good.
Let go of your need to control,
for you really have none.
Let go of your need for a plan,
for I am all you really ever need!

I invite you, My child, to let Me in.
Let Me into your concerns,
for I can bear your load.
Let Me into your life,
for I do know what I am doing.
Let Me into your heart,
for I am the One you were created for.

I invite you, My child,
to know the truth.
Know that I care for you and I will see to your needs.
Know that I am taking care of them even now.
Know that I am Your Faithful Father.


His Child:
Lord, help me to trust when I don’t want to trust
Lord, help me to love when I don’t want to love
Lord, help to give, when I don’t want to give
To give my life to You.

For You, O Lord, are the Lover of my soul
And You, O Lord, are faithful
Yes, You O Lord, will watch over me
And care for me better than I ever could.

Thank you again and again to each and every one of you for joining me again as I share my life and ministry with you through this venue. My prayer for myself and each of you this month is the same one Jesus taught us to pray all those many years ago and continues to teach us even this day:

"Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
Your kingdom come,
Your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
Forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one.
for yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.
Amen.

Sharing My Life (9/26/07): Arriving?

As I look forward to and plan for my Ordination Service, I find myself pausing and reflecting about what it will mean to be ordained. In the world of chaplaincy, it’s one notch below being Board-Certified, which is my next goal. Yet even after that, there will still be ongoing work and continual growth and improvement. Which brings me to the question, will I ever actually arrive in my ministry as a chaplain or even in my ministry in general? Will I ever get to the point where I can say I am finally doing the ministry God called me to? Or maybe I have arrived already. Maybe I am already ministering in the area where God has called me. Sometimes I get so into planning for and looking forward to my future ministry that I miss the opportunities right around me here and now. And maybe I’m not the only one? ;-)

Life Update (9/26/07): Get Your Calendars Ready!!

I met with Calvary’s Ordination Council a few weeks ago and they unanimously decided to recommend me for ordination! There were about twelve pastors there from five local churches and they asked me about various things from my opinions about infant baptism all the way to how I thought my view of the end times effected how I lived currently. There were a few questions that caught me off guard, but as a whole I think I handled myself pretty well with them, thank God. The council did suggest I get a mentor to help me develop my theology more, so I’ll be working on that as my pastor and I plan for the Ordination Service.

The Ordination Service is set to happen on Sunday, November 4th 2007 at Calvary Baptist Church, 2120 Lexington Ave. N., Roseville, MN 55113 at 4 pm in their Worship Center. I have invited Barry Jass, the pastor at Cornerstone Church, where I attended throughout my four years at Bethel Seminary, to give the main message and there will also be an opportunity for people to come up an lay hands on me in prayer for my continuing ministry. So, put the date on your calendars and come one, come all. I’d love to see any and all of you there.

A Vision for What We Can Become as the Church

Over the years I have been involved in a number of different churches both in a leadership role and as a lay person, and in through that involvement I have seen our weaknesses and strengths as the present body of Christ. I have also dreamed of what we could become. This is not a dream for any specific church, but for the Church at large. It is for Christ’s body throughout the United States and the world.

In the fourth chapter of his letter to the church in Ephesus, Paul writes to that church about the critical need to work together as a united body of Christ. He points out the gifts that each of us, as believers in Christ, have been given and says that these gifts are given to us to help us build each other up in Christ. These gifts lend are given to us to help us take part in the church through our roles therein and the culmination of that build-up is seen as the unification of the church. Through that unity we each and all will become what Christ dreamed for us to become. Indeed we will become what He gave His very life for us to become.

Maybe it’s just me, but whenever I read that passage I get chills. According to Paul we can become and do so much as a unified body of Christ, yet today we, as His body, are really pretty divided. We are divided by race, by politics, by age, by gender, by theology, by belief, by worship style, the list goes on. You name it and we are divided by it. It would almost seem that the very gifts that God has given us to make us each wonderfully unique children of God and to unite us as His diverse and harmonious body are the very things that divide us and keep us from being all that we were meant to be in Christ. Though Paul doesn’t come right out and say it, it seems pretty clear to me that there are things God means for us to do and become that we cannot in our current divided state.

Yet there is more to it than just coming together as a united body of Christ. The Holy Spirit has given us each gifts to share and roles in which to serve God as we work together to become all that He created us to become and do all that He dreamed we would do. Paul writes here of roles within the church, yet I believe his message also applies to almost every profession in the world today. Whether we be pastors, lawyers, doctors, nurses, social workers, counselors, janitors, carpenters, fill in the blank. Whatever role we have in the world is also meant to be our role in the church. For the church is more than just a building or denomination or a single small body of believers. It is each an every one of us who call ourselves Christians and are called by God in Christ working together to make a difference in this world through Christ for God.

What is this difference we were called to make? I believe we each and all already know the answer to that question. We may each articulate differently according to our own traditions and religious backgrounds, but I believe each and every one of you can agree that the Church exists to save the world. Indeed, probably the most know Bible verse in the world today, John 3:16, states just that: Christ came into the world to save it. And we, as His body, have the same mission. We exist to save the world!
Yet we cannot save the world in our current broken state. There are so many mission organizations, so many churches, so many ministries all working towards this same goal, yet so often we end up coming short. So often we become convinced that only we, in our ministry or our church or our mission, have the one right way of accomplishing the mission, that we miss the point. That point is that no one church or ministry or mission can do it alone, nor were we even meant to. We were meant to work together, each contributing our strengths and compensating for each other’s weaknesses.

This is my dream and my vision for the body of Christ. I dream the broken souls throughout the world would come to our doors and find there the healing they need. Healing for the soul through prayer, worship and biblical teaching; healing for their finances through financial assistance and planning; healing for their social needs through counseling and social networking; healing for the legal needs through legal advice and counsel; healing for their medical needs through healthcare; again the list goes on. The brokenness of our world is multi-faceted and it’s salvation is meant to be just as diverse. We each have gifts to give and a role to play, and the world has yet to experience what we are meant to be, the body of Christ dwelling and working together in unity!

Meaningful Words (9/4/07)

A week or so after I got the news from Saint Cloud, I got Overdressed, the latest CD from Caedmon’s Call, one of my favorite bands. I broke the seal, started to listen and found many of the songs really applicable to my current situation. Here are a few favorites:

Hold the Light
it’s been a long year
like a long sleepness night
Jacob wrestled the angel
but I’m too tired to fight
Every Wednesday
for two years we’ve met
I’ve showed you all my anger,
my doubts and bitterness

there was no judgment in your eyes
just the silent peace of God
that felt so real in you

will you hold the light for me?

and I stay up late
because I cannot sleep
I don’t want to face the quiet
where its just God and me

I’m waiting for the gavel
handing me the sentence down
because I don’t believe forgiveness
or even repentance now

I want to feel redemption
flowing through my veins
I want to see with clear eyes
beyond lust and hate
I want the war to be over
and know the good guys won
and I want love to hold me
to know I’m not alone

standing around a willow weeping
we were praying in the backyard
in the chill of the night
the friendship light reminded me who we are

Expectations
that boy had the highest of expectations
and he heard that Jesus would fill him up
maybe something got lost in the language
if this was full, then why bother?

this was not the way it looked on the billboard
smiling family beaming down on the interstate

and you know that we all try to blame someone
when our dreams won’t rise up from their sleep
and the reaching of the steeple felt like one more
expensive ad for something cheap

he dressed up nice for the congregation
scared somebody’s gonna find him out
through the din and the clatter of the hallelujahs
a stained-glass Jesus sings.

Start Again
I have a constant need for motion
I need to leave the past behind
to see all the good things I left dying
come to life
for so long I let the lies deceive me
and I let them take their toll
but I’m growing tired of the illusion
I am in control

you are there in all my histories
my victories and pains
you are there in all my shadows
with forgiveness you are waiting

when I need a place to hide
when I need a place to hide

I need hope to start again
I need hope to start again
you give me hope, and I need hope to start again

into my own hands I take matters
cause deep in my heart I stole the throne
where you have always led so faithfully
I know
doesn’t it seem I’m always running
and most of the time it’s not to you
(all other ground is sinking sand)
give me faith to know
your promises are true

here is the place where I face my secrets
and where I lay them down


Thank you to each and every one of you for joining me again as I share my life and ministry with you through this venue. As I think about how to close this letter out, I keep coming back to Paul’s exhortation for church unity in Ephesians 4: “As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope when you were called— one Lord, one faith, one baptism; 6one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.” Paul then goes on to talk about how we as a church need to come together in unity to fully mature in Christ. It’s almost as if he’s saying there are things we are only capable of doing and being as one united church. We are only capable of doing so much in our present divided state. So, let us work together to help each other be all we can be in Him.

Sharing My Life (9/4/07): Rejoicing in the present moments

Being turned down by Saint Cloud really caused me to rethink how I think about God’s will for my life. I realized that part of the reason I was really disappointed is that I had been under the impression that it was God’s will that I be in Saint Cloud working full time as a chaplain there. Getting rejected kind of opened my eyes to the idea that maybe I don’t need to know what God’s will is that far down the path. All I really need to worry about is the time I have right here in front of me. The past is gone and cannot be change no matter how much I fret about it. The future is in God’s hands and only He knows what’s going to happen then. But this present moment, this piece of time is mine and God has given me everything I need to fully serve Him in it (Matthew 6:25-34).

Life Update (9/4/07): Staying around here

About a week and a half after I interviewed with Saint Cloud Hospital, they informed me that the position had been filled. At first I was a bit disappointed, but in the days and weeks that followed I am learning to be thankful for the opportunities I do have to work and minister, and not focus so much on the closed doors. My volunteer ministry work with Christian Student Fellowship is beginning to take shape and my work with St. John’s and St. Joe’s is continuing. Also, my Ordination Council is all set for Friday, September 14th at Calvary. Please keep me in prayer as I continue to serve God in the venues He has set before me. Thank you!

In addition, plans for my birthday celebration are coming together quickly now. The party itself is set for Wednesday, September 12th from 6-10 pm. Those coming are asked to bring their own food and beverage, as well as a group game to share, if they like. I am open to hanging out with people throughout that day and week to celebrate my birthday if they are unable to make it to the party. So, anyone in town, feel free to come on down and celebrate God’s work in and through me for another year!